not a coincidence

coincidence...i think not
Current mood:  weird

yep. july 17th. 2010.

that's right. it's the date of my 20 year high school reunion. in all likely hood, i will be attending said torturous evening. and in all likely hood i will not be walking in with my husband on my arm. instead i'm hoping to find a much more pleasing escort who just happens to have graduated along with me. i'm gonna have to seriously work my magic to talk him into it though. and boy do i have a long way to go before i'm worthy of hot girlfriend status again. 

gulp. sigh. i feel nauseous just thinking about it.

the subject came up last night during dinner with two friends, one of whom graduated right along with me in 1990. she wants to go to this little soiree with hundreds of people we barely know. probably because she's even more beautiful and charming than she was as a teenager....bitch. me, on the other hand, not so much diggin the idea. the royal blue polyester was a crowning achievement in my 17 years and i wore it proudly. however, i never thought i would warm to the idea of a "reunion". what's the point, really? we already have the voyeuristic tools we crave with social networking sites. besides, i was never a super popular kid or a huge nerd or could really be put into a category per say. i knew lots of people, yes, but i really don't have anything to prove. but i am curious in  a shallow and vacant way so i'll probably be there.

but i'm mulling over the idea. so after dinner last night, and a little time with the man i hope will be my date for said event (you are listening, right!), i looked at a calendar. curiosity i suppose but here's the weird part.........

the date of the reunion is a saturday which means that this past summer, july 17th was, you guessed it, a friday. and i don't know why but i went back to my journal for that same date this past summer. just a few short months ago. and i was floored to find that on july 17th this year, i was writing about what a fantastic southern barbecue lunch i had just shared with an old friend. about the rain that followed on the way home. how i was late for my sitter. i had written about how much i enjoyed seeing him again, after all these years, that i felt like i could say anything to him. how i was instantly attracted to him and how wrong that seemed given the fact that i was married. in that entry i questioned whether it was a good idea to see him again, even as a friend, because something felt different. there was a connection perhaps but definitely not something i should pursue. i even used the word "dangerous" to describe how he made me feel. 

and with that, i was speechless. how on earth could it be that i was on a friendly lunch date with him just a few months ago and now i'm looking at that same date, 1 year later, and contemplating the cost of liposuction? i don't know about other folks, but i don't believe in coincidence.

fate, perhaps. destiny, sometimes. luck, oh, i'm definitely lucky. but coincidence.....

now i know why i bought those ruby slippers in the first place.